What if your life partner and an acquaintance, sports fans both, watched the Big Game by themselves?
What if an attractive area parent brought his or her kid over for a play date while you were at work?
"They didn't know I was reading their conversations," which enabled Anderson to study their self-professed motivations, without them worrying about being judged, Anderson said.
(When they sign up for Ashley Madison, users agree to terms of service that include the possibility that their profile information and usage of the site may be studied for research purposes, Anderson said.) About two-thirds of the women said they were seeking more romantic passion, which always involved sex.
All told, that included about 42,000 lines of text, Anderson said.
Most of the women exchanged a few messages with potential partners before taking their interaction offline or ending conversation altogether, he said.
Several said they’d be uncomfortable if their spouse or partner engaged in certain interactions without them and/or felt their spouses might not be happy with them if they did the same. In many parts of the world, of course, ideas about what married people can and can’t do are enforced by religious and legal authorities (mostly to the detriment of women), but no one here was suggesting that they were uneasy about the mere idea of men and women (or gay men and women and other gay men and women, as it were) being alone together.
“I would say ‘OK,’ but I will probably not really be OK with it,” said one. None said that the hypothetical situations would make them seriously suspicious that their partners were being unfaithful.
Though the findings are limited to just one dating website — and one catering to people seeking to cheat — they suggest that many women who are unfaithful are not dissatisfied overall with their partners, Anderson said. Most of the women wanted just one affair partner and sought at least some emotional connection, Anderson said.But my friend raised the stakes by proposing similar hypothetical situations that weren’t as easy to dismiss.Maybe it wouldn’t bother you if your spouse were home with a repair person—but what if he/she mentioned stopping by a single colleague’s house to finish up a project they were working on together?She has a master's degree in bioengineering from the University of Washington and a graduate certificate in science writing from the University of California Santa Cruz.One of my friends’ neighbors recently told him a provocative story about cable repair.