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The problem is that it can feel like obsessing and analyzing will have some sort of payoff, like there will be a reward for all this time and energy spent attempting to figure out what’s what…but there won’t be. He lights up around you, he is excited to see you, he loves spending time with you, and he wants to get to know you more.
Once he does, either a relationship will develop, or it won’t.
(If it doesn’t, it’s probably because he realized you aren’t compatible.) TAKE THE QUIZ: Does He Like Me? You see it in the way he looks at you, in the way he talks to you, in the way he factors you into his life. When I first started dating my husband, like very early on, I remember that if he took a little while to text me back he would always give me an explanation as to why, something like, “I’m sorry, I’m at a noisy bar and didn’t feel my phone vibrate.” I would never expect him to reply to my texts right away, and I would never expect or need an explanation.
People get busy; sometimes I go hours without responding to texts. His explanations for his texting lag-time were his way of showing me I mattered, that I was important to him, that he would never read a text from me and not reply to him. And when a guy likes you, you will have countless examples like that. You don’t worry about the relationship or stress over it and doing so would almost seem silly. Your friends will see it, your family will see it, the waitress will see it. MORE: How to Stop Stressing Over Your Relationship If he likes you, and wants to be in a relationship with you, he will make sure you know it and he will pursue it.
Even if you’re just dating but you aren’t official, you don’t worry. If he likes you but doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you, then …who cares? I have made the mistake of waiting around for some guy to get his act together, and those situations never end well.