You can overrreact to each seemingly personal slight, or you can deal with it in a graceful and detached manner like Lorraine. I couldn’t disagree with Kristy more as far as her logic for not giving the guy Lorraine went on a date with a 2nd chance.I currently have 4 or 5 “backups” because I’m focusing most of my attention on one guy at the moment.All I AM saying is that based on your own experience, a high percentage of men disappoint. After all, you ever have a good date with a guy but not feel strongly enough to see him again? THIS is what I see over and over and over again Your solution is not to change men. Your solution is to understand that rejection and failure happens to EVERYONE. Nonetheless, we went out for drinks and dinner tonight. So although we spent a long time getting to know one another and seemed to have mutual attraction, and rather powerful chemistry (ok, we kissed! But in this case, I would be REALLY surprised if we didn’t go out again. What I love about this email is how it illustrates Lorraine’s growth as a single woman in the dating world. Ask yourself if you’d be as positive, patient, forgiving and confident as she was. He’s not into sports at all, it was that he liked THE STORY.Too short, too fat, too old, too nice, too boring, not enough money, too many other dating options? She didn’t get derailed when the guy disappeared the first time. If not – and if you’d like to approach dating like Lorraine, you can reach me here. Warmest wishes and much love, Evan His biggest crime, apparently, was that he met another woman first and was honest enough to – gasp! I have you to thank for that, I would never have thought about that had I not listened to your advice. Particularly timely given that dude that I had such a fun time with and am annoyingly so attracted to has yet to call again.If you haven’t already registered for this free weekly advice, please click here: Below is a copy of the newsletter that got emailed to thousands of women just this morning.I got a flurry of emails in response to it and would love to hear your feedback. Maybe you met in real life and flirted for two straight hours.This is long, so make sure you have 5 minutes to yourself. Maybe you’ve been emailing and talking on the phone every night for a week.Maybe you had an effortless first date that lasted until 2am.
1) Be Independent Some “experts” say you should act unavailable.
To top it all off, he said he would call Lorraine if things didn’t work out!
How much time and effort did he really give his current relationship? And who in the world wants to be his sloppy second?
Until then, it’s all speculation, hope, fantasy, desire, wishful thinking, and potential. What I’m writing about is what you make all of this dating stuff MEAN. remember the phone session we had last month where we were looking at one of the guys who had written to me on Match.
See, you’re identifying each man as the problem here. After all, if 50% of all guys are going to disappoint, then this behavior is utterly predictable. But then after exchanging several emails and a few phone conversations, he told me he was dating someone else and that he would call if things didn’t work out, and I was a bit upset by that. She doesn’t assume that they’re “together” because they kissed.